Oct 20

Today is a public holiday in India. It is 6′o clock in the evening. I am standing on the roof of my house. It has started getting some dark. I am feeling very low toady. Life has started looking miserable to me. Every decision that I have taken up to now looks wrong to me. My confidence level is lowest ever. Feels like a loser. Who is not able to achieve anything in his life? Luck does not look favoring me. Every thing looks confusing. Mind has come to a halt and accepting it’s defeat. Body, mind and soul all are losing their equilibrium. Getting more frustrated while considering the future. For me no light does looks coming from anywhere. It looks as everything is lost. I have never been so much sad ever. Then what has happened now.

This may be the frustration of not achieving my desired goals. In this comparing world, I am finding myself losing the grip of my self and my goals. Things have not gone as thought. Friends and relatives success are arises self comparison in me. Feeling shamed of this state. Every body is busy in his life. No help looks coming from anywhere, making me more and more helpless. Why is this to me? I asked this question to the God. What like every time I received no reply.

Then suddenly my attention goes to a small dog playing in the grass. I know him; he is the same small puppy of the street. Puppy is alone, but still he looks very happy. He is rolling here and their. He is running and rolling on the grass like a mad dog. He looks like a most happy dog on the earth. His face is shinning like God. He looks like the messenger of God. I looked at him and than at myself. Why this difference of happiness is their. Why this dog is happier?
If I compare my self with the dog, than I have much more then him. I have a job, a house and specially food for the evening, where as the dog has to struggle for the food for evening. He has to even fight for the basic thing of life. Chances are that, he may have to stays without food tonight. But still he is happy, because he living in this movement. He not concerned about the future. He is enjoying the present. He is not comparing himself with the other dogs. He not frustrated by the happiness of other dogs.

Now by looking at myself, I have realized that I have gone lower to even a small dog. My mental state is even poor than this innocent dog. What has happened to me? I have studied so many things. My knowledge level is much more than this small dog. However in happiness, he is the king and I am baggier. The reason is clear; his happiness depends upon himself and not upon others. He is living in present and enjoying it. He doesn’t have the big goals to fulfill. He has no ego to satisfy.

Life is not achieving big dreams or creating wealth. It is much more then this. We lose most of our life in these issues. Most of the time, we are in dreaming about future or worrying about some outcome in future. Or we are busy in comparing our self with others. Why because we have learned this thing only. Every body around us is doing the same. Planning about the future is OK. But it should not over burden us. We have to take a lesson from this small puppy and start enjoying our life.

http://www.geocties.com/arvindkatoch1
http://thoughts-of-a-ordinary-man.blogspot.com

Oct 18

Most companies do specify a budget for Secret Santa gifts and prefer to avoid giving booze and sexual toys as gifts. So how do you find gifts that are under £20 and yet are fun to give? Just log on to the internet and let your fingers do the shopping this Christmas, there are many websites that offer unique gifts to suit your budget and tastes. From funky to bizarre, to practical and unusual you can choose the gifts that take your fancy.

Make a small gift basket for the coffee addicts. You can put in a redeemable coupon from Starbucks, a variety of coffee mix sachets, a vibrant coffee mug and assorted cookies. If you have the time, you can even personalize the coffee mugs by getting the recipient’s name printed on it. A similar basket can be created for movie buffs as well. The basket contents can comprise of movie tickets or a video rental gift card along with bags of popcorn and snacks to munch on. You can also add soda cans if you like.

A white Christmas though beautiful can be pretty cold and a pair of battery operated heated gloves might be just what the doctor ordered. Your colleagues will appreciate your thoughtful gift on a dreary winter morning. A heated travel mug as a car companion for someone on the move is fabulous and to make it more attractive, you can add herbal or flavoured tea infusions in the mug and then gift it. A mini car heater and cooler that instantly warms/cools the interiors is a wonderful gift for the whole year.

Oct 17

Most coaches get involved in coaching for one extremely compelling and valuable purpose – because they want to make a positive impact to the lives of others.

As a coach, the extent to which you are able to fulfil that objective is contingent upon two factors. Firstly, your skill and effectiveness as a coach; and secondly, on the number of clients you are able to affect through the application of your services. The purpose of this article is to focus on the second factor.

In the process of assisting people, it’s also possible for coaches to develop a fruitful lifestyle for themselves along the way. In fact, these objectives are entirely complimentary.

Many business people, including coaches, fail to recognise the important ethical role that marketing plays in their business. In doing so they develop a mindset that is self defeating to themselves, their business, and their clients.

As a coach, you are in business. How effectively you operate your business is entirely contingent on you. There are enormously successful coaches (in terms of client numbers, income and coaching outcomes), and coaches that are barely able to etch out a living. The difference between these extremes is not their coaching competency, but rather their mindset. You may be an incredibly skilful coach, but unless you have people willing to use your services, your skills are of little to no value.

So what mindset does it take to be a successful coach?

A successful coaching mindset:

- Puts the needs of prospects and clients first;

- Actively seeks to assist clients attain their objectives;

- Is empathetic to the needs of clients and prospects;

- Doesn’t limit the service offered to clients, and

- Acts as an ethical adviser.

It takes a Marketing Mindset to be a successful coach.

We regularly hear of coaches that feel as though marketing is ‘leading’ and ‘unethical.’ They feel as though it’s too ’salesy’ and don’t feel comfortable with it. For those coaches, we’re going to explain why marketing is both ethically valid and commercially crucial.

Ethical Validity

There is an enormous (and growing) volume of people in society that would benefit from coaching services. Let’s call these people prospective coaching clients, or prospects. These prospects have specific goals they’d like to achieve, or challenges they’d like to overcome, with a view to leading a better and more fulfilling life.

As a coach you have a certain duty of care to assist these people. You can only begin to assist them once they’re utilising your services. Marketing is the link between the prospects desire and your ability to assist them fulfil their desire.

Marketing only becomes unethical in the circumstance that you are not able to fulfil your marketing promise to your client. In this instance you’ve misled your client, either knowingly or unknowingly, and have acted unethically.

On the premise that prospects will seek a coach to assist them attain their specific goals, it’s the ethical obligation of coaches to help prospects select a coach that will best be able to assist them. To do this coaches should fully, comprehensively and transparently disclose to prospects what services they offer; where their specialties lie; what experience they have; how they’ve assisted people with similar desires in the past; and how using their services will benefit them. Or to state it more simply, to undertake marketing.

Commercially Crucial

Marketing is commercially crucial because it links prospects that desire a certain outcome with skilled professionals trained to assist them achieve that outcome. It identifies you as someone that may be able to assist prospects with their pre-qualified needs. By seeking out information on coaching services, prospects have already identified for themselves:

1. That there are certain things in their life they’d like to attain or challenges they’d like to overcome.

2. That a coach is a person with the requisite skills and experience to assist them.

3. That they are willing to invest financially in the process.

The above is an extremely important point, and one that coaches need to accept.

As we explained earlier, coaches generally come from one of two schools of thought with respect to marketing.

The first school of thought perceives marketing to be ‘leading’ and ’salesy.’ They come from the paradigm that by marketing you are proactively influencing someone in their decisions. Or specifically that you may make someone do something they would not otherwise do. We call this train of thought the Influencing Paradigm.

The second school of thought accepts that prospects are people that have identified for themselves their need to invoke change. And they’ve identified that a coach will assist them make that change. They recognise that the prospect has made the intellectual link between their needs and how they want those needs to be fulfilled. We call this train of thought the Service Paradigm.

The thought processes of these two perspectives are entirely dipolar. One positions the prospect as someone reluctantly influenced into utilising a service, and the other positions the prospect as a proactive individual capable of determining their needs that has actively sought out coaching services.

As a coach, it’s critical that you put yourself in the second paradigm of thinking. Only then will you be able to ethically fulfil your objective of assisting your clients. And only then will you be able to fulfil your symbiotic goal of building a successful coaching business.

By putting yourself in the Service Paradigm of thought you will recognise that to assist clients meet their objectives, you should:

- Actively promote your services through compelling advertising that clearly describes what you can offer clients.

- Understand that as a coach and a trusted advisor you are often in a better position of knowledge to ascertain your client needs to assist them attain their goals.

- Be empathetic to the needs of your clients and actively offer solutions to them through various products and services.

- Value your client’s intellect and decision making ability.

- Do not pre-empt your client’s wants and hence limit the range and scope of products and services you offer them.

- Always acts as an ethical adviser.

Once you embrace the Service Paradigm to marketing, you’ll realise that marketing provides you with a much greater opportunity to fulfil your primary objectives – to assist your clients, and to build a successful coaching business. These objectives become complimentary and you create a truly win-win situation between the desires of your clients and your own desires.

In the second part of this article we’ll provide you with further information on how to develop your Marketing Mindset and a Service Paradigm.

While an individual would like to improve an aspect or certain aspects of their life so they can achieve a specific goal, or set of goals.

Life Coaching Institute is Australia’s leading coach training organisation. Learn more about LCI coach training programs and receive a FREE GIFT at http://www.lcia.com.au/lz

Oct 16

How many more servings of the daytime self-help salad will it take to sooth your appetite? To actually get your life to where you want it to be? To actually start seeing changes for yourself rather than just on the tear-filled faces of Oprah’s latest guests?

How about the alternatives? If you stick with TV then you will likely wind up in frightening dead ends with the likes of Jerry, Ricky and Montel. So, you read a few more Chicken Soup books, listen to another Anthony Robbins seminar and double up on the appointments with your shrink. Still nothing?

Consider coaching. Within the past decade, life (or personal) coaching has become the self-help book put into action. Once reserved for executives facing tough decisions in elite corners of corporate America, coaching has now become a catalyst for success in life, career and relationships for mainstream America. Think of coaching as having your own Dr. Phil on call; someone there not to diagnose emotional problems or feel your pain, but to help you set better goals, take more action, make better decisions and use your natural strengths more fully.

Coaching has been touted as a cutting edge resource for life success by every form of national media. Health Magazine recently called coaching, “The path to success.” The Washington Post recently headlined, “many who want a winning record in the game of life are hiring a Life coach.” The profession is even showcased in a new reality TV show called Starting Over, although many coaches see this as painting the profession as merely the latest self-help fad.

Here’s how it works. Life coaches are retained on a monthly basis with fees ranging from $150-$400, on average. This generally includes three or four coaching sessions that last anywhere from half an hour to a full hour. Most coaches also provide additional support and communication between sessions via e-mail, instant messaging or brief “check in” phone calls. It is also common practice for coaches to provide a free introductory session for potential clients to get a sampling of what being coached is like and to see if they “click” with their potential coach. Those hiring coaches run the gamut. Coaching clients are parents, teachers, business professionals, “Midlifers”, students and business owners. They are basically, anyone ready for life change through the support, guidance, challenge and clarity that coaching provides. When moving forward rather than digging deeper begins to sound like the right recipe, then coaching might be your next best step. Don’t forget, Jerry, Ricky and Montel will always be there to remind you of the alternatives!

About The Author

Robert A. Eubanks, Ph.D. is a personal coach whose mission is to help others balance their lives, achieve personal goals and begin living their passions. For a complimentary coaching session or more information about coaching, go to www.bridgetosolutions.com or call 561-385-9184.

bridgetosolutions@yahoo.com

Oct 16

WHAT’S IN YOUR TOOLBOX?

Think tools are just for builders and construction workers? Think again!

Everyone needs a well stocked toolbox.

Over the years, given the wisdom of life’s experiences and much learning, I have assembled my own psychological toolbox. It contains, among other things,

Ideas from diverse schools of thought
Different ways of perceiving
Trust in the wisdom contained in my body
An open mind
An open heart
A creative spirit

Acquiring effective coping tools changed my life. (There’s an understatement!) In times of stress, these tools bring me back to center and realign me with my higher self. They lead me to receiving nourishment when I need comfort. They help me find safety within myself and in this world. I now have many practices which reconnect me to divine source when I wander off the path. When worry, stress, self-doubt, or victim thinking fill my mind, it’s time to dig through the toolbox and pull out one (or many) strategies that help bring me back into a more natural state of peace and empowerment.

Each of us has a range of coping mechanisms that we employ when faced with stress. Sometimes, a solution as easy as taking a few deep breaths and putting the situation back into perspective can bring us back into balance. Once in a while a brisk walk outdoors brings us a sense of relaxation when we need it most. While at other times a steamy bath, candles, Mozart, and cup of warm tea is what is needed to soothe the body, mind and soul. What doesn’t work is continuing to worry about the problem without taking action, remaining in victim thinking, berating ourselves, or ignoring our needs.

Most people have a toolbox of coping mechanisms that effectively get us through life’s tougher situations. But if that toolbox isn’t very full with empowering tools, then we are unable to cope with balance when a stressful situation arises. Oftentimes, people who use food to cope (anorexia, bulimia, compulsive overeating, binge eating, etc.) do not have many soothing, calming, nurturing tools to alleviate anxiety. The use of food or addiction becomes one of the few ways to reduce the effects of stress from the mind and body.

Whether you’re aware of it or not, you have a toolbox. But maybe it’s time to inventory the contents. Do your tools help you survive – or do they help you thrive? Are there enough tools to support you as you build the life you want? Take a look at the following two lists and notice how you would go about the business of consciously filling your personal toolbox for success

Some questions to ask yourself:

1) How can I utilize my tools better?

2) What new tools do I need to acquire?

3) Which tools can I replace or eliminate?

INEFFECTIVE TOOLBOX STRATEGIES:

Self-judgement (stupid, lazy, worthless, etc.)

Self-criticism

Poor me

Big fat slob

Self-pity

I can never have what I want

Seeking other’s acceptance

Mental chatter

Binge eating

Anorexia and starving

Bulimia

Excessive busyness

Drinking

Drugging

Numbing out

Excessive Sleep

Checking out

Depression

Creating illness in times of stress

EFFECTIVE TOOLBOX STRATEGIES:

Communicating and expressing feelings

Supportive self-talk

Journal writing

Self soothing strategies

Talking to self in mirror with encouraging statements

Releasing anger safely and effectively

Accepting emotions and emotional pain

Voicing emotions instead of stuffing emotions down

Speaking truth instead of hiding real feelings, opinions

Setting written goals

Recognizing accomplishments and successes

Empowering affirmations

Visualization and imagery

Relaxation strategies

Abdominal breathing techniques

Healthy movement, dance, yoga, etc.

Inspirational books, poetry, religion

Emotionally supportive music

Surround yourself with beauty

Add more fun to your life!

Copyright 2005, Dr. Annette Colby, all rights reserved.

Annette Colby - EzineArticles Expert Author

Dr. Annette Colby, RD
Nutrition Therapist & Master Energy Healer
Annette@AnnetteColby.com
972.985.8750

“Opening Creative Portals to Success”

For free inspirational newsletter, articles & info visit:
http://www.LovingMiracles.com

Oct 14

Have you ever noticed this to be true?

The best things in life for me are those things are not things at all. People and experiences make the biggest mark: a wonderful relationship, time with family, or a fantastic vacation that stays in my mind for years.

It seems funny to me that we spend so much time on this planet chasing “things” that we lose focus on what matters most. I mean, what’s the point of having that fantastic new home if you sleep in it all alone? Or drive the nicest of cars but are too ill to take it out for a spin?

Last week I was fortunate enough to meet an incredible guy named David. He’s one of the wealthiest people I’ve ever met, and one of the richest guys I’ve come across.

What’s the difference you ask? Well, I’ve known many wealthy people (the type with all the material resources you could imagine), and then I’ve met truly rich people who have one thing in common: they have balance.

David has all the monetary success you could ever imagine, yet what made him special in my eye is that he wasn’t driven by money; it was more about his relationships. His wife and children mean the most to him inside. He works out every day, watches his diet, and here’s the real kicker, he doesn’t care what other people think of him. Even though he has all the money anyone could want, need, or desire, he drives a modest car and lives in a modest home, for that’s all he says he really needs.

David told me stories of how “keeping up with the Joneses” made him live up to other people’s expectations, and how he now chooses to simply live up to his own expectations instead. What a great thought, huh? It got it got me to thinking as well, and to ask this question that I share with you now:

How would I live my life differently, if I lived it only for me? I mean, do I have to wait until I’m wealthy before I begin to enjoy the simple pleasures that surround me each day?

Imagine the freedom we’d have, not attempting to impress anyone other than ourselves. Imagine the free time we’d have in our minds, dreaming of what inspires us…rather than wasting time attempting to please everyone else.

I suppose the lesson to be learned here is that this freedom can be ours . . . and already exists before us. We simply need to accept its challenge.

The challenge is this: For one month, make a conscious effort to do what pleases you. Be proud of your success (but don’t brag), wear the clothes that make you comfortable and happy, eliminate the fear to dance, take that risk you’ve been holding back, and whatever you do . . . Keep smilin’

You have permission to publish this article electronically or in print, free of charge, as long as the bylines are included. A courtesy copy of your publication would be appreciated – send to: GregReid@AlwaysGood.com

EzineArticles Expert Author Greg Reid

About The Author

Gregory Scott Reid GregReid@AlwaysGood.com Speaker and two-time #1 best-selling author, The Millionaire Mentor and Wake Up: Live the Life You Love www.AlwaysGood.com

Oct 14

Most of us know that assertiveness will get you further in life than being passive or aggressive. But few of us were actually taught how to be assertive. Here are some helpful tips.

1. Choose the right time. Imagine you’re dashing down the hall on your way to a meeting. Lisa passes by. You call out, “Can you have the Microsoft project out by Tuesday?” Because you haven’t scheduled a special time to bring up the issue, Lisa has no reason to think your request deserves high priority.

2. Choose the right place. Discuss important issues in a private, neutral location.

3. Be direct. For example, “Lisa, I would like you to work overtime on the Microsoft project.” Whether or not Lisa likes your request, she respects you for your directness.

4. Say “I,” not “we.” Instead of saying, “We need the project by Tuesday,” say, “I would like you to finish the project by Tuesday.”

5. Be specific. Instead of, “Put a rush on the Microsoft project,” say, “I would like the Microsoft project finished and on Joe’s desk by 9:00 Tuesday morning.”

6. Use body language to emphasize your words. “Lisa, I need that report Tuesday morning,” is an assertive statement. But if you mumble this statement while staring at the floor, you undermine your message.

7. Confirm your request. Ask your staff to take notes at meetings. At the end of each meeting, ask your group to repeat back the specifics that were agreed upon. This minimizes miscommunication.

8. Stand up for yourself. Don’t allow others to take advantage of you; insist on being treated fairly. Here are a few examples: “I was here first,” “I’d like more coffee, please,” “Excuse me, but I have another appointment,” “Please turn down the radio,” or “This steak is well done, but I asked for medium rare.”

9. Learn to be friendly with people you would like to know better. Do not avoid people because you don’t know what to say. Smile at people. Convey that you are happy to see them.

10. Express your opinions honestly. When you disagree with someone, do not pretend to agree. When you are asked to do something unreasonable, ask for an explanation.

11. Share your experiences and opinions. When you have done something worthwhile, let others know about it.

12. Learn to accept kind words. When someone compliments you, say, “Thank you.”

13. Maintain eye contact when you are in a conversation.

14. Don’t get personal. When expressing annoyance or criticism, comment on the person’s behavior rather than attacking the person. For example: “Please don’t talk to me that way,” rather than, “What kind of jerk are you?”

15. Use “I” statements when commenting on another’s behavior. For example: “When you cancel social arrangements at the last minute, it’s extremely inconvenient and I feel really annoyed.”

16. State what you want. If appropriate, ask for another behavior. (“I think we’d better sit down and try to figure out how we can make plans together and cut down on this kind of problem.”)

17. Look for good examples. Pay attention to assertive people and model your behavior after theirs.

18. Start slowly. Express your assertiveness in low-anxiety situations at first; don’t leap into a highly emotional situation until you have more confidence. Most people don’t learn new skills overnight.

19. Reward yourself each time you push yourself to formulate an assertive response. Do this regardless of the response from the other person.

20. Don’t put yourself down when you behave passively or aggressively. Instead, identify where you went off course and learn how to improve.

Garrett Coan is a professional therapist, coach, and pscyhotherapist. His two New Jersey office locations are accessible to individuals who reside in Bergen County, Rockland County, Essex County, Passaic County and Manhattan. He also offers online and telephone counseling services. He can be accessed through http://www.creativecounselors.com or at 201-303-4303.

Oct 12

Think you can’t change? Many of us already know that we need to improve our state of well-being in order to extend our lives as we age. Making changes are traditionally difficult, but the good news is that it’s never too late to make changes for the better. The first step is to understand what’s important to you, and then determine the choices and decisions that represent where you want to be. Maybe you want to start a new career, lose weight, stop smoking or start exercising. Whatever the change is, be sure you understand why you want to make the change.

Take a moment to think about a time in your life when you made a successful change or developed a new habit. What was your motivation for the change? What was your attitude at the time? What obstacles or barriers did you have to overcome? Your level of readiness to change will determine how successful you are, and how much time it will take. Once you make the decision to change, you must practice that new behavior one day at a time until it becomes a habit – a lasting change.

What allows some people to change, while others don’t? According to Dr. James Prochaska, developer of the “Stages of Change Model,” people cycle through a very distinct set of stages when making changes in their lives – from not being interested in making any changes, all the way through to maintaining a change after it’s already been made. This is the real challenge for everyone, because resistance is always the initial response to making a change. Sometimes people don’t see the positive side of change until it’s shown to them (or until they are forced to realize it on their own). Change is a choice. It’s something we decide to do. The same goes for wellness – it’s a choice, and once you have decided to change, you’ll feel better.

Embracing the concept of change is a big thing, because interestingly, many people think they don’t have a choice when it comes to change. Why? For some it’s fear, guilt, love, pain, time management or even a court order. What motivates one person may not be the same thing that gets another person to act. Everyone reacts differently to changes weather voluntary or mandatory.

To start making a change, let go of certain assumptions or ways of doing things, to make room for new ideas. Work on this one day at a time until you feel comfortable. This often comes into play when I work with sedentary people to increase their activity level (people who work a lot and don’t have a lot of time to exercise). One of my clients’ complaints was, “I don’t want to take an hour or 30 minutes to walk.” My solution was to suggest several two-minute intervals that would equal 30 minutes throughout the day just stand up, walk around and visit people throughout the office, for example. The result was successful. He exercised and actually became more sociable as a result! Once he became comfortable with walking, I got him up to 10-minute intervals three times a day. Now he’s walking 30 minutes at one time and enjoying it. This all took place over the course of a few months.

To make a lasting change, you start wherever you are and stretch a tiny bit more each time. If you fall off the wagon, or experience resistance, identify the cause or circumstances who you were with, where you were, or your emotional state. The key is to get up and get back on the path again. You may go back and forward a few times because making a lasting change is hard. Your level of readiness to change will determine how successful you are, and how much time it will take. But you need to be ready, able and willing to make change happen.

Diane Randall is a Certified Wellness Coach who works primarily with adults over 30 to help them reclaim their zest and drive for life. Randall began her wellness journey over fifteen years ago when an unexplained health crisis forced her to adopt a better way of living, and has since used her education and experiences to help countless others. Randall speaks and writes about a variety of health and wellness related topics affecting the adult community.

Contact her at diane@LifeAccelerated.com or visit her online at www.LifeAccelerated.com and take the FREE Wellness Assessment.

Oct 12

“I can’t seem to discover why I’m on the planet.”

“What is my purpose here? I know there’s something I’m supposed to be doing, but I don’t know how to find out what it is.”

“I don’t seem to be passionate about anything.”

I’ve heard these complaints over and over from my clients.

Discovering our passion and purpose is vital to our joy and well-being. The problem is that many people have lost touch with any sense of their passion and purpose and have no idea how to access this information.

The blueprint for this information lies within our core Self, our essence, the true Self that is often buried during our early years. If our true Self was not seen and validated by our parents, teachers, or other caregivers, it is likely to have gone underground. The self many of know as our “self” is generally our wounded self, our ego, the self we created to get love and avoid pain. Our wounded self has within it all of our fears and false beliefs, and does not have access to what is true for us.

How, then, do we discover our passion and purpose if the blueprint for this information is long buried? The good news is that while it is buried, it is not lost. Anyone can reclaim this information if you are willing to do the inner work of healing your wounded self.

I’ve worked with thousands of clients who, as they practice the Inner Bonding process that I teach (see our FREE course at www.innerbonding.com), gradually heal their fears and false, limiting beliefs to the point where their true Self comes peeking out. This is the vital, alive aspect of ourselves, the aspect of us that just wants to joyfully express ourselves in the world. As you allow this aspect to emerge, you will gradually discover what truly brings you joy.

In our society, we tend to ignore our special talents and choose our careers according to what will give us a sense of security. Too often, however, what makes us feel safe does not fulfill us spiritually. For example, Roger worked for many years as an attorney, but he never enjoyed it. He made lots of money, yet when he consulted with me he was suffering from anxiety and depression. He had become an attorney because his father had been an attorney and wanted Roger to follow in his footsteps. Roger had gone along with what his father wanted for him because he didn’t know what else he wanted and now, in midlife, he was miserable. He yearned to discover his passion.

A few months after starting to practice Inner Bonding, Roger remembered that he had really wanted to be a teacher. He had never seriously considered teaching because he felt he couldn’t make enough money, but now he was willing to make far less money because he was so unhappy with his present work. Roger went back to school and got his teaching credential and is now a high school social studies teacher. The last time I spoke with him he was radiant! He loved working with adolescents, and he felt he was making a real contribution to their lives. For the first time ever, he felt alive and passionate about his life. His wife decided to take up some of the financial slack by doing something she had always wanted to do: design children’s clothing. She started her own mail-order business and is thrilled with it. Their marriage and family life is flourishing because both of them are happy and fulfilled within themselves.

Ricki came to see me because she was so unhappy working as a controller of a big import business. Yet she had no idea what else she wanted to do. It took about a year of practicing Inner Bonding before her true Self told her that she wanted to be a nutritionist. Ricki hadn’t wanted to hear her true Self because she didn’t want to go back to school. Finally she was so unhappy that she decided to listen. She is now back in school enjoying discovering her passion.

While it may not always be possible to change your work immediately to something you love, if you follow your passion, it will often lead you there. And even when you have to earn money in ways that do not express your soul, you can seek volunteer opportunities and hobbies to express who you are. Often these can lead to the work that you will eventually do.

Alfredo worked as a manager of a large supermarket. With his small savings, he decided to start pursuing a hobby that had always fascinated him – restoring old cars. He used all his extra money to buy his first old car and spent many blissful hours restoring it. He was so good at it, he was able to sell his restored cars for a lot of money. Eventually he was able to quit his job at the market and pursue his passion full time. Ultimately he started a project in a prison teaching inmates to restore cars. Alfredo now loves what he does and receives great satisfaction from helping others.

Your soul has a deep desire for you to express yourself in ways that brings you joy. It is your job to discover what that is and to bring it about.

Margaret Paul, Ph.D. is the best-selling author and co-author of eight books, including “Do I Have To Give Up Me To Be Loved By You?” She is the co-creator of the powerful Inner Bonding healing process. Learn Inner Bonding now! Visit her web site for a FREE Inner Bonding course: www.innerbonding.com or mailto:margaret@innerbonding.com. Phone sessions available.

Oct 9

What’s the single most important process determining whether or not your coaching business is successful?

The correct answer to this question can completely change your coaching business forever. It can change your perception of your business. It can change your focus in your business. It can change how you go about operating your business. And most importantly, it can determine the success or otherwise of your business.

We asked dozens of coaches this question and got a broad array of responses. But only 4% of them were even close to the mark! Most coaches answered: quality service; number of clients; pricing; branding; advertising copy.

…And whilst all these issues are critical, the single most important process is your marketing methodology. Whilst you must have all the other elements as well, it’s your marketing methodology that ultimately determines the success or otherwise of your business.

Let us explain…

Nearly all coaches use a marketing methodology that’s a sales-based marketing methodology. This is understandable as most traditional marketing methods teach sales-based marketing methods. We’re all impacted by sales-based marketing at every turn – on TV, newspapers, magazines, billboards, radio – everywhere. And when coaches research marketing methods, they are most likely to learn about traditional sales-based marketing methodologies – print ads (in newspapers, yellow pages, journals, magazines etc), direct telephone calls, radio, flyers, direct mail letters, etc.

But there are several extremely powerful forces at play against coaches employing a sales-based marketing methodology…

Most coaches invariably feel uncomfortable delivering a ’sales pitch.’ Coaches generally have better technical skills than marketing skills. They’re therefore uncomfortable talking about themselves and endorsing the quality of their product. This means they don’t close, and comes across to prospects as a general lack of confidence in themselves, and their product and service.

Sales marketing is extremely expensive – narrowing your net margin on your service. The more you spend to get a client the less net profit you’ll retain at the end.

Generally people are very sceptical and defensive against sales approaches. This exponentially increases the barrier of making a sale. When you employ a sales-based marketing method, most prospects have already closed themselves off to learning about your services due to their natural tendency to put up a defence against sales-based marketing.

There is no trust and rapport built through a sales-based marketing approach. For a prospect to buy from you, there needs to be an element of trust. Your prospect needs to trust that you can deliver on your promises and that they’ll gain a positive return on their investment. This level of trust is extremely difficult to build through a sales-based marketing approach.

You build no reciprocal obligation on the prospect to investigate your offer or purchase from you. It’s a natural human tendency to reciprocate in kind what’s been given to you. You can not build reciprocal obligation through sales-based marketing.

You attract price sensitive shoppers and ‘tyre kickers’ that take up a lot of your time and result in extremely low conversion.

It’s difficult to maintain contact with prospects for long enough to build rapport and trust – it generally takes 4 to 6 contacts before a prospect will buy from you.

So, we can hear you shouting “If sales-based marketing is not going to be effective, what’s my alternative to get clients?”

And the answer is… Education-based Marketing. Education-based marketing is simply the process by which you attract and convert highly-qualified clients by giving them what they want – valuable information and advice that solves their problems – and removing what they don’t want, a sales pitch.

Education-based marketing is generally undertaken by delivering Credibility Marketing techniques such as public speaking, information based teleclasses, publications, networking, hotlines, free educational give aways (such as reports, assessments, tools, ecourses), etc.

As opposed to sales-based marketing, education-based marketing means…

- You give your prospect what they really want – highly valuable information. And you take away what they don’t want – a sales pitch.

- You maintain your dignity and feel good about yourself as you never make an effort to sell.

- Your brand recognition and respect will skyrocket! Education-based marketing is the ultimate brand builder. By positioning yourself as the ‘expert’ or ’specialist’ by solving, through your education products, the most pressing issues your niche confronts. You become the only logical choice in your market.

- You can establish yourself as a credible authority as prospects depend on you as a reliable source of valuable advice.

- You significantly reduce your marketing costs – and can in fact get paid to market yourself. This vastly compounds the net worth of every client you attract – you can actually earn double the net profit with only half the clients!

- You don’t have to seek out new prospects – prospects come to you (to have their problems solved).

- You can maintain (mutually beneficial) contact with your prospects through the sales process because they don’t feel pressured by a sales pitch and value your information and advice.

- You reach prospects early during the first stages of their decision making process.

- You attract ‘moderately interested’ prospects that may otherwise be afraid to call you but are not afraid to request your information.

- Due to the high level of trust and rapport built early on you’ll be perceived as an adviser, not a salesperson, making added-value sales dramatically easier.

- You dramatically increase your referrals from prospects as they feel loyal to you – due to a relationship built on trust and reciprocal obligation and your efforts to help them – even if they don’t hire you! And your referrals will come much earlier in your relationship.

- You gain compounded advantage as your information is passed freely between prospects within your niche.

- You gain a competitive advantage because not many competitors are using education-based marketing.

- You achieve a highly leveraged advantage as you can put forward your marketing even when you are not present.

- You save valuable time as you often are delivering your message directly to your most highly qualified target audience.

As you can see, education-based marketing is the exact opposite to sales-based marketing, and can make an extraordinary difference to your business, and your enjoyment of ‘doing’ business. So, ask yourself, “How much education-based marketing am I currently doing?” and “How can I develop a marketing plan significantly comprised of education-based marketing methodologies?”

Life Coaching Institute is Australia’s leading coach training organisation. Learn more about LCI coach training programs and receive a FREE GIFT at www.lcia.com.au/lz

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